Category Archives: Yoga

Blog posts about yoga practice

Why I (still) teach

17 Tuesday Jul 2018

Posted by in #nothingforgranted, Bad Yogi, Beauty Reports, Dragon, Forrest Yoga, Life Lessons, Mending the Hoop, Yoga

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It’s kind of funny.  I haven’t thought much about why I teach yoga lately and then, in the past few days, I’ve been shown so many reminders of the power in sharing this passion.

I teach because it is my passion.  I have frequently thought that I need to expand my knowledge of yogic texts and still want to explore them, my passion for yoga comes through the power in the asana practice. I feel this practice – and that may sound corny and standard, but the more I teach and practice, the more I begin to realize how kinesthetic I am.  In my practice, I play with small movements, little changes, different muscle activations to feel them in my body.  When I teach, I’ve been catching myself “doing the cue” before giving it to students so that my words give them what to chase/experience.

I teach for connection.  It’s a basic human need that is often overlooked.  We crave authentic connections with other people.  We crave growth.  We want to share out paths. Just this past weekend, I had a student come to one of my classes.  When I introduced myself, he said that he had taken my class before.  As we dove into when/where, it was over two years ago at a gym that is no longer on my schedule.  He took one class; he remembered that one class; he remembered me.  Now, he’s decided he needs to supplement his life with yoga; he tracked me down.  It’s a humbling feeling but it’s a really great feeling to have a student seek me out because of one class two years ago.

As a teacher, I want to challenge my students to become their best selves – both on and off the mat.  I’m inspired by students new to the practice that try an arm balance or inversion; by students that acknowledge how the practice has taught them to breathe and to feel themselves; by students that work through their shadows to find their light; and by other teachers that challenge me to “step up my game” on a regular basis to give students more opportunity to grow.

I teach because I practice every day.  And my daily practice, regardless of what it is, belongs completely to me.  I’m selfish with this time.  But I want students to be selfish with their time on the mat too. That’s where and how strength, integrity, breath, spirit, and going deeper turn us on to becoming our best self.

We get on the mat.  We breathe.  We make shapes.  From there, we allow the magick to happen.

2018 – Time to pick up yoga

02 Tuesday Jan 2018

Posted by in Bad Yogi, Forrest Yoga, Yoga

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It is that time of year again – many of us look toward 2018 and what we want to accomplish or change.  Becoming more healthy is often times at the top of the list.  Fitness resolutions can be a great motivation to change habits, improve fitness, and create a more healthy life.

Yoga is a great addition to any fitness resolution but can be intimidating, especially for anyone that has not spent much time on a yoga mat.  Regardless of if you are joining a gym or a yoga studio here are some tips and suggestions to get your yoga practice off to a healthy start.

  • Arrive to class early. Getting to class early is a great chance to meet the teacher.  Introduce yourself.  Share your goals, your fears, and where you think yoga may help you out.  Let the teacher know your yoga experience and ask for any tips to make the class more successful for you as a student.
  • Keep your mind open. DC has an incredibly strong teacher population and each teacher practices and teaches from a style that resonates with them.  There is a yoga secret here that needs to be shared – you will not respond to every teacher.  And that’s ok.  Take classes from a variety of teachers to find the ones that you really like taking class with.  And then keep taking class with them, while still trying new to you teachers out.
  • Don’t spend a lot of money. There is a vast quantity of yoga props and clothing you can buy.  When you initially start, do not go overboard buying these things.  Instead, find out if you can rent a mat from the gym or studio as a way of test driving mats.  Clothing should be comfortable, easy to move in, and allow for you to focus instead on the practice and think less about “looking the part.”
  • Give yourself time to learn and grow into the practice. Yoga is an incredibly amazing way to help become more fit.  But there is a significant learning curve.  Rather than focusing on achieving an inversion or arm balance, focus on the poses that help you learn to connect more deeply with your breath, your body, and laying the groundwork for those poses.
  • Come back. As mentioned previously, yoga is a journey, and should be approached as such.  Starting the practice once or twice per week is a really great start.  Let yoga work in your fitness and in your life in the magical way that it does.
  • Have fun.   Have fun with your practice.  Bring a friend.  Make friends with those around you during your practice.  Building these connections helps to establish a longer, healthier practice both on and off the mat.
  • Show up. Time on the mat is one of the best, and only, opportunities we still have to shut off the phone, step out of the office, leave friends/family outside, and focus only on ourselves.  It is an amazing chance to learn more about yourself.  But you have to be willing to show up – every time you roll the mat out.

The mat is waiting.

Berlin update

12 Tuesday Sep 2017

Posted by in Bad Yogi, Beauty Reports, Dragon, Forrest Yoga, Yoga

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If you think I’ve been quiet this month, you’re partly right.  I’m currently in Berlin assisting the Forrest Yoga Foundation Training with Ana, Jose, and some of my best friends/mentors/family/yogi’s on the planet as fellow assistants.  It’s been an incredible month so far, with over 70 trainees learning to become Forrest Yoga teachers.  It’s humbling to be part of their journeys.

While the focus is on helping the trainees step into their own power, we assistants have regular feedback from Ana (and each other) to become stronger versions of ourselves.  The focus for my month has been around my heart and all of the stupid shields I put up as protection, the patterns and habits I developed around those shields, and pretty much shaking them all up.

IT’S BEEN AMAZING!  Working with such a strong team is inspiring and I’ll be heading home with a few ideas to work on and develop.  So much more to say about this but there’s a time and place for everything.  So stay tuned.

If you want to really see what I’m up to, follow me on social media — @badyogidc.

Truth Speak – 02/03/17

03 Friday Feb 2017

Posted by in #nothingforgranted, Bad Yogi, Beauty Reports, Dragon, Forrest, Forrest Yoga, Life Lessons, Mending the Hoop, Truth, Yoga

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I’m pretty sure we all suffer from them.  And when they hit us, we feel blindsided.  They are our nemesis thoughts.  The asshole critic that lives in our own head.  That never shuts up.  My critic, my nemesis thoughts, get more aggressive, more ugly, more hateful when I ignore them.  They spiral out of control.  They break my spirit.  Dim my light.  I’m sick of them.

Today on my mat, in a practice that I thought would feel good in my body and wouldn’t bring up much of anything, a few of these thoughts came up.  I felt them hit my body full force.  I stopped my practice.  I wasted some time by drinking some tea.  I almost gave up.

But I didn’t.  In a very brief moment, the voice of Ana Forrest snuck in.  She saw me.  And she reminded me that I learned a long time ago that those thoughts are lies.  To jump on a popular hashtag, they are #alternativefacts.

In Forrest Yoga, we teach to an apex pose – it’s the pose in the sequence that we warm the body up for, work on opening and creating space for, and is the “most advanced” pose of class.  My apex today was staying on my mat.  That one brief respite when Ana very much spoke the exact opposite of my nemesis gave me the courage to say those words for myself.  I cried.  And I tried to not cry.  But I cried more.

My apex today was showing up for myself.  Because I’m worth it.  Because my students are worth it.  My teacher is worth it.  My friends/family are worth.  I will continue to show up.  I will have my moments where my nemesis thought is loud, abrasive, ugly.  But someone, in that moment, will sneak into my mind and remind me – the toughest work is often done with another.  And I am not alone.

***I film practices to take pictures from often; I take pictures throughout practice.  This picture is that moment when the thought landed.  When I thought I wasn’t worth ….

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Intention, October ’16

01 Saturday Oct 2016

Posted by in Bad Yogi, Beauty Reports, Dragon, Forrest, Forrest Yoga, Intention setting, Intentions, Mending the Hoop, Yoga

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It’s time for a new intention.  Well, not that I’m getting rid of the old ones.  That’s the fun thing about working with intents – we can add to them, allow them to evolve, or even re-use the same ones repeatedly.  I’ve been feeling the intention for this month churn inside me for a few weeks now.  With the new moon yesterday, new month today, and rainy weather here today, it feels like the right time to start.

Back story – I’ve been emotionally overwhelmed lately.  News of hate, violence, killings, beatings, etc. is really getting to me.  The level of disrespect is increasing at rates that we may have never felt before.  I’ve noticed my shoulders getting heavier with the weight of all things worldly and I’ve seen the same in bodies of students.  There have been definite moments I’ve wanted to retreat, to hide, to shield, and then to build my fortress.  I did that once.  And I’m still tearing down those walls, so I know that’s not really an option.

This month, I’m working with the word ‘connection.’  Each day, I’m going to go deeper connecting with my own spirit.  Using some lessons from Ana Forrest, I’m going to feed my spirit daily, to delight it, and to feel my own light grow brighter.  And each day, I’m going to connect to the spirit of anyone the universe leads across my path.  I’m going to see people as human.  Not a designer label, not a social class, but an outright human.  And hopefully, whether they feel it or not, their spirit will feel the value my spirit places on them.  And they get to grow brighter too.

While I’m not sure, I feel like actually connecting with myself and with others with true kindness is the beginning lesson we need to change this world.  To heal.  Authentic connection can be the catalyst to change, but as brightly as I know I can shine, I can’t do it alone.  If connecting to your own spirit is new to you, I’m going to give some ideas of how I’ll be connecting.  If you have that but aren’t sure how to connect to others, I’ve got some suggestions.  They’re just suggestions and you’ll figure out what will work for you.  Use this intent, share this intent.  And let’s all shine more.

Connecting to spirit: meditate; dance; sing; yoga; learn something new every day; play a drum; play a flute; play something; laugh; go outside; walk a dog; scratch a cat; feel the earth; look up; read a book; write a journal; write a poem.

Connecting to others: get off the computer; get off Facebook; call; write a letter; meet for coffee; meet for dinner; say hi to a stranger; open a door; say thank you; don’t look away; put phones down; laugh; sing; dance; hug; share a poem; share a song.

The sun rose

30 Thursday Jun 2016

Posted by in #nothingforgranted, Bad Yogi, Beauty Reports, Breath, Dragon, Life Lessons

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And I guess it’ll continue to rise.  Grief is a funny emotion – it hits in this odd moments, in these different manners, and at points feels overpowering.  There have been moments today that I’m who I was a week ago – #AYogiAndHisDog.  And then I look at the couch and he’s not there; I go to the bedroom and he’s gone.  I tried to nap today but my napping companion didn’t join me and I couldn’t.

I’ve been in grief before.  I know how it’s done.  I know how it fucks us up.  But I’m also different now.  I know I can breathe.  I understand that the voice in my head making me feel guilty for “grieving wrong” is full of shit and this is my process.  Grief demands that – to honor the process; not to force anything; and to be human.

I taught my 7am class as usual; rushed home to walk Baxter only to remember on my way in that his walk wasn’t necessary.  I broke down completely in my noon class and shared a moment of authenticity with the class – that I didn’t want to teach that class but because of who they are and the power they hold, I was able to make it through.  I thought about filling his empty water dish.  The apartment feels “quiet.”  That statement is a weird one because he wasn’t a loud dog; it’s missing his energy that makes if feel quiet.

The sun set tonight.  It’ll come back up tomorrow.  I offered sage to the Sacred Ones yesterday for him, for me, for healing.  Today, I offered sage to help prevent me from hiding, from shielding.  Tomorrow, I don’t know what the prayer to the Sacred Ones will include but community is something that is coming across strongly right now.

Baxter saved my life.  I’ve said it so many times before.  Now it’s time for me to save my own.  #WhenTheGoingGetsTough #TheToughStartBreathing.

#heartinabox

09 Monday Nov 2015

Posted by in #nothingforgranted, Beauty Reports, Breath, Dragon, Forrest Yoga, Intention setting, Intentions, Life Lessons

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I’m currently working on a pretty big issue in my life.  After my ex died a few years ago, I did something to protect myself that at the time, made sense.  I boxed my heart up and hid it away.  Because at that point in my life, I was completely shattered.  And at that point in my life, I wasn’t sure how I’d breathe, let alone walk and take steps forward on my path.

Cut to last month in Chicago.  I’d forgotten how securely I built the box around my heart.  During the Forrest Foundation training, another assistant and I demonstrated a seeing exercise.  During the exercise, she quite accurately saw my heart wanting to burst out of the box.  After that discovery, I’m working on revealing more of my heart and letting it out of the box entirely.  Scary, I know.

Part of that process has been to come at the box with everything I have.  And what I can say is that attention, or type of attack, is just building the boxes defenses up even more.  Needless to say, that was not my goal.  During a Forrest class yesterday, with the focus to breathe into one spot for the entire class, the realization came to me – I’ve been coming at the box with a sledgehammer when it wanted a feather.

One thing that Ana said last month during the training is ringing true.  We often attack with everything we have but in reality, just need a bit of compassion.  I applied compassion during class yesterday and the result wasn’t shift or opening but a movement toward awareness.  It was an interesting day yesterday and today as well – with much introspection and deep breath.  I can softly acknowledge that I’m on this path now toward letting my heart out.  I’m not sure how long it’ll take but I’m walking it.  And trying to allow my heart to lead the way.

Current state of yoga

11 Sunday Jan 2015

Posted by in Bad Yogi, Life Lessons, Yoga

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Interesting title to the post tonight, eh?  Hopefully it peaked a little bit of curiosity.

A friend and fellow teacher posted on her Facebook wall this phrase today: “Dear yogis, be kind to other yogis.  Love a yogi!”  Reading that phrase, you may be thinking that yoga is all about peace, love, and om.  But a different energy has begun to shift into yoga that needs to be addressed and cannot (should not) be ignored.

It’s competition.  Oddly enough, for what may be a group of people that are more “zen” than average, yoga has become a competitive sport.  I’ve had other yoga teachers/practitioners/students post on my Instagram (IG) photos how I could better achieve a pose, many of whom I only follow and who follow me – never having met in the real world.  I’ve had friends and fellow teachers call me out for being a “young” teacher in my short two years.  I’ve been surprised by students and teachers of other styles confronting me when they do not agree with my primary style of yoga – Forrest.

And it saddens me.  Deeply.  What is that about and where does it come from?  My opinion (and it’s just mine), is that it is the influence of the world at large.  Business is about making a buck; yoga teaching has changed from guiding and helping students to making a buck.  I get and acknowledge – as a teacher in DC, I am a small fish in the pond.  I’ve known in my heart there are bigger fish circling.  But rather than setting out to “win,” why not set out to lift?

It’s my goal with the term bad yogi.  We each have our own path.  While my path is right for me, my path is not right for you.  And vice versa.  I get excited for students and friends of mine that go for more advanced or additional trainings, even if it’s a style I don’t practice or know much about.  That excitement comes because that friend is stepping out on their path.  Every step forward on a path is THRILLING!  And should be celebrated.  When friends/teachers get new teaching jobs, I get excited for them because that’s the (non-spoken) goal of most teachers – to reach a broader audience of student.  And when teachers speak down about the day in, day out grind of teaching, I will call them on it because quite frankly, we are so lucky to do what we do.  Having worked in numerous office settings, 9-5 and Monday-Friday, I will tell anyone that listens – teaching yoga is the BEST thing I’ve ever done.  I honor that daily.

What does all that mean?  I don’t know.  Honestly.  I think that everyone – yogis and non – need to do a better job of truly being happy for others.  Of learning that someone else, when they achieve success, doesn’t actually take away from our own experience of it.  And I think that IG yogis that correct my heart opening poses and coach me to go deeper need to know – every heart opener causes amounts of panic to roll up through me that only with deep breathing and a desire to walk my path have allowed me to actually hold the pose long enough to snap a picture.

Just breathe

12 Wednesday Nov 2014

Posted by in Breath, Forrest, Intentions

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Today’s theme was brought to me by breath.  And it served as an AMAZING reminder how powerful breath can be.

I had one student attend my morning class and as with all private sessions, I asked where she would like to focus.  Her response – breath and core.  I sat her in meditation and asked for her to breathe deeply.  After picking up on “catches” in her breath, I asked how she felt when she inhaled.  She was sick with pneumonia a year ago and was still trying to get her lung capacity back up.

I worked with her on expanding her lungs, sitting behind her and reading where the prana (energy) was getting stuck.  At one point, I placed my fingers deeply into her collarbone and asked her to send breath there.  She could but with obvious and literal pain.  For the rest of the practice, I encouraged her to stay just under that pain cut threshold but to inhale slowly.

Cut to me, offering an adjustment in Warrior I, less than 30 minutes later.  She had hiked her shoulders to her ears and I was helping her find a place of comfort there.  When I felt a clear, unrestrained breath hit her collarbone.  When I asked her about it, she purposefully inhaled to that spot again and said “It doesn’t hurt.”

The end of my day concluded with a Forrest class centered entirely in my lungs.  I could feel the expansiveness of my front, back, left, and right side as I inhaled.  I felt my ribs expanding, allowing the life force to flow easier into my very being.

Breath is one of those things that we take for granted.  Our bodies inhale and exhale without us actually having to think.  But what happens when we do – when we slow our inhale down and allow our exhale to just release?  We find space.  We find calm.  We find a way and a reason to actually begin to breathe freely again.  And to let some shit go.

Forrest Yoga is NOTHING without breath.  It’s through breath that we learn to ride the edge; we learn to stalk that which is holding us back and either snuggle in close with it and make it our friend or we release it with an amazing lion’s breath.  The roar from a really cleansing lion’s breath is beyond amazing.  But it only happens when we breathe into a space where we want to let something go.

So breath.  #justbreathe  Sounds easy.  But a phrase I’ve used in many a yoga class is “When the going gets tough, the tough start to breathe.”

Perfectly imperfect

08 Wednesday Oct 2014

Posted by in Life Lessons, Yoga

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We have all seen the pictures on Instagram and other social media platforms – perfect yogi bodies, in the perfect lighting, with appropriate shadows, striking a stunning pose. Hell, I’m guilty of setting up a picture and then waiting for the “Likes” to start rolling in. These posts often include either a scripture reference explaining why THAT pose is important or how that pose makes the yogi feel.
But we’re missing out on our flaws. I have been concerned that non-yogis will either think these advanced asanas are easy to do and thereby risk injury. Or they get completely turned off by the perfect form, thinking they’ll never achieve that level of posture. It can be intimidating to walk into a classroom and see students in a beautiful expression of forward folding – back straight, legs strong, chest on thighs. I was working with a student standing on one leg in tree pose; her breath and energy were vivid reflections with her frustrations on not being able to stand easily on that leg. I walked behind her, activated my feet, slowed my own breathing, and lightly touched her shoulders. I asked her “Why do you care so much? Because I don’t.” Immediately her energy changed. Her breath slowed. And the tension she was allowing to build in her shoulders began to subside.
Why do we care so much? Yoga is supposed to be peaceful and healing. But rather, we’re making it about image. Do not misunderstand, I think there’s a time and a place for projecting an image of “perfect form,” but the world is also aching for honesty.
Ana Forrest called me out time and again on my push for perfection in my practice. I struggle daily with my mind dropping into old habits of critiques, judgement, and frustration when my forearm balance looks and feels accidental. But I’m beginning to catch my mind in these moments and tell it “who cares?” This is my practice today and it’s further along than it was yesterday but maybe not as far as tomorrow. So who cares?
As a yogi on Instagram, I’m going to start with myself…and knowingly and willingly post pictures of me that are not the best form, with horrendous lighting, and possibly a bulldog in the background wishing I’d let him nap. Since #stopanddropyoga is a thing, I’ll challenge yogis to hopefully read this blog and to post a #perfectlyimperfect photo.