Look at me, being all productive putting this out there only three days into the month. I just finished assisting the Forrest Yoga Foundation training. And I have so many takeaways and learnings that I still need to process/put into action. So this month, I’ll focus on the uptake. I haven’t necessarily excelled at the uptake; in fact, I may have a slight reputation for going hard/fast to get things accomplished. Ana pointed this out to me in January of this year to uptake the Beauty, the nourishment, the joy, the healing in yoga poses. But I’m also taking that off the mat and into life.
So here are some things I’m bringing from last month to this month. And there will more than likely be pieces of the puzzle added.
I push myself hard, process things quickly as a need to prove myself. Which is absolutely stupid. I am the only me on this planet, therefore no one else can or should be on the exact same identical path. That need to prove comes from a place of seeking validation that I matter. So I’m going to uptake my own worth, my value, that I am enough.
If you read back through my blog, you know Baxter transitioned last year. I feel his spirit around me quite frequently. But apparently, he’s with me even when I don’t feel him. And his lesson to me – love. It’s that absolute, authentic love that we all strive to discover. When Mike died, I very specifically remember saying the phrase “I can never hurt like this again.” Not knowing at that point the power and magick in those words. It’s been five years, a lot of therapy, a lot of processing, so much learning, feeling, and so many breaths into my heart, but it’s happening. The shields have almost all dropped. My heart that was in a box wants to come out to play and dance. So I’m uptaking that sensation – wanting to live and to love again.
I have a few more things I’m taking away, but for here/now, this is what I’m feeling this month. Feel free to uptake along!