Do you ever have those moments that cause you to stop, take a breath, and then feel what’s going on? Yeah, they happen a lot for me. And yesterday I had that moment, prompted by a comment by a friend, that’s been churning away in my mind and in my heart.
2016 is a year of healing for me. I very specifically set an intention this year of growing myself as a person and healing from some trauma I’ve experienced in my life. It’s not an easy task and I’ve been going at it fairly hard for three months. I had a vacation last week and as my luck is, came home and got sick. Yay? AD, the friend referenced above, mentioned I’ve been getting sick more lately and that maybe I should check in with my spirit to see what’s up.
Well. Shit. One of the first things that came up for me is my lack of kindness – for myself. I’m working on clearing myself of some pretty big issues. And the work is hard and apparently exhausting. How do I take care of myself when I’m moving these huge boulders from my life? I haven’t been. I’m adamant in my convictions to students that when they begin to process something big to go gently; be kind; reward themselves; and to understand the bigger picture.
But those words have been completely lost on me. So today, March 9, three months in, I’m adding to my intention. To daily acknowledge the work I’m doing isn’t an overnight success. The small victory needs to be celebrated as much as the big revelation. I don’t know what the daily affirmation will look or feel like yet, but like me, it’ll be a work in progress. My healing is worth that. And acknowledging my worth is something that I have a hard time doing. Because I’m still fighting the flu but I really want to get some yoga in, I’m going to nap, sage my apartment, and then maybe play on my mat. Maybe not. Because of the glorious day outside, I may end up outside with Baxter and a book. And as the sun shines down upon us, I’ll honor path, acknowledge the work I’ve done, and ask the Sacred Ones to remind me daily to be kind. Because kindness,,,,we’re all worthy.